Xander_Schaan's Xanga

I Hate My Brain

Mon, 12 Oct 2009 17:03:28 GMT

The past couple of nights, I've had very vivid ideas for some stories I'd like to write, but they happened right before I fell asleep. I argued with myself about whether or not I should get up and jot down some ideas or try to remember them for the next day. I went back and forth, and my brain finally assured me that he'd remember the stories for me.

Liar.

Twittering for Fun and Profit

Wed, 30 Sep 2009 18:16:43 GMT

I think Twitter is the worst thing to come out of the Internet since Facebook. It's like a blog for idiots with no attention span.

Naturally, I've decided to get one.

My initial post says everything that needs to be said about my account.

I'm hoping to have some fun with it, but I'll have no problem abandoning it as soon as it becomes boring, which I give about a week.

Living Off Others

Mon, 28 Sep 2009 18:11:46 GMT

The weird thing about amusing.org is the simple fact that I sometimes submit something and completely forget about it before it shows up on the website, so I'll laugh at something and then be totally shocked when my name appears below it.

That's what happened with me with this entry. What's funny, though, to me, is that the answer to my prayers did come with a love of hummus.

And hummus has always been a funny word.

I wonder if I'll start showing up in Google searches for hummus now. Apparently, I'm the number three search on Google for children under the stairs. I don't know why that's such a popular search string, but I get hit with that about once a day lately.

Go figure.

License Plates

Fri, 11 Sep 2009 16:09:12 GMT

When I was a kid on trips to Iowa, we used to try to "collect" license plates from as many different states as possible.

Recently, in 5 mph traffic on our way to Minneapolis, Haven and I started to play the game. We've been playing it throughout the summer, though, and we have twenty-five states (including Hawaii, how weird is that?) and three Canadian provinces.

Looking at that many license plates, though, leads us to reading a lot of personalized plates. Haven and I began discussing what license plates we'd like. Here are a few that I remember discussing.

TEOSINTE Obviously our cat, but incomprehensible to most people who don't know us.
TEO Shorter and simpler.
X&S Based on names we've used online for message boards and the like.
FAVEY or SALAD Ask Haven about these.

Then we saw a WWJD license plate, which led to some speculation as to what we could do. Please note that we're not making fun of WWJD; we're just goofing around a bit. You know how punchy people can get on long car trips.

WWTD What would Teo do? (Probably meow a lot and be cute.)
WWBD What would Buddha do? (This one's probably taken.)
WWDPD What would Deadpool do?
WWSMD What would Superman do? (Or Spider-Man or a sadomasochist... It would depend on our mood when someone asks.)
WWWAD What would "Weird Al" do?

The last license plate I can remember discussing, and the one we'd be most likely to get is PQ7&XW4Z. Do I even need to explain it? It think it's pretty obvious.

I'm Still Alive

Thu, 10 Sep 2009 18:24:19 GMT

Yeah, I have a ton of ideas bouncing around inside my head and little to no time to implement them. Basically, I'm planning to get my computer up and running, type up these ideas, and then transfer them to a disk. Then I can post them where I want (if I want), and everything will be wonderful.

In a weird moment, the library computer freaked out, so I signed out. I re-signed in, and everything popped up again, even my partially completed post here.

Memo to self: NEVER abandon a library computer.

Relying on Others (Again)

Thu, 20 Aug 2009 23:42:59 GMT

I know I've mentioned amusing.org before, but I'm mentioning it again. I have two new ones there. The first one is currently on the front page and is a variation on a phrase I actually use. The other is a few days older and can be found here.

Edited to note: the front page one is now here.

Things That Go PHHHBBBTTT in the Night

Thu, 20 Aug 2009 22:35:32 GMT

Last night I came home from work, and Siri had already gone to bed because it was a bit late and she wasn't feeling well. She said she had an upset stomach, so I agreed to let her have the bed to herself so she could get up in a hurry if she needed to. I was still a little wired from work like I so often am, so I settled down in the living room to watch a little bit of X-Files. I'm sitting here watching a rather serious episode about reverse-engineered space craft when I heard a rather loud explosion of gaseous emissions from the bedroom.

I mean, loud.

Granted, I had the TV turned down low so I wouldn't bother Siri, but I would have probably heard it even if I'd had the TV up louder.

I gladly slept in the guest room after that for my own protection.

This morning I went to make us pancakes. I added blueberries to Siri's and went to add chocolate chips to mine. We had been to the grocery store the day before, and I'd picked up sugar-free chocolate chips because they were the ones on sale. I took down the bag, and it was nearly empty.

Siri admitted that she'd had a bit of a craving the night before and there really wasn't much else to snack on in the apartment. I figured no big deal and started putting chocolate chips in my pancake.

And that's when I noticed the warning on the bag that said, essentially, that in some people the chocolate chips may have a laxative effect.

We had a good laugh over it.

And then she dared me to blog about it.

So here you go.

Random

Thu, 13 Aug 2009 16:34:07 GMT

I have so many things bopping around in my head right now, but I really don't have time to get into all of them. I sit at work and work out rant after rant, but I don't have home Internet access at the moment, so they all go fallow.

To make up for a bit of that, I'm going to do a quick bullet list, and maybe someday I'll get into full rants on them.

When did hips become a form of communication? Does anyone really talk with his or her hips? And if hips don't lie, why aren't all political debates held in the form of a dance competition rather than the current format?
Taylor Swift has probably the worst songs on the radio right now, and that's saying a LOT since the popular music channel here in Fargo has a lot of awful music. Taylor Swift, though, is worse than most rappers and pop artists because she's played on both the pop and country stations.
Will.I.Am is a good actor. He should stick to that and not subject the world to any more crappy Black Eyed Peas songs. I believe there is a total of one good BEP song.
I may lock the radio in the office one of these days. So help me, I will set it to NPR and crank it up and lock it away just to avoid this one radio station.
I need to update my rules for restaurant visitors that I posted earlier.
I hate Facebook more and more over time. Why, oh why, does it insist on making me unable to type in another tab when I get a new private message over there? And, no, I do not want to post my Xanga post on Facebook. How can I default that check box to off?
Oh, and, no, I do not want to friggin' change to the new Xanga homepage. I've said no every time they've offered, and I've continued to say no. Who do I have to kill, pay off, or perform other unsavory acts upon to stop having to click to the new homepage and then away again every other time I sign in here? They say people that have given it a chance have really liked it, but I've gone to the comment page, and I read nothing but complaints about it. Funny how that works.

Ok, that's enough for now.

I Am Alive

Mon, 03 Aug 2009 17:15:26 GMT

Yeah, I'm still around. We don't have Internet at the new place, yet*, so we're relegated to the library for most of our computer time. Life is good for the most part, though. Some kinks to work out at work with two full-time managers again, but it'll be fine in the end.

*If we get it, of course.

Oops

Thu, 11 Jun 2009 02:55:15 GMT

Hey, kids and adults.

If you got an invitation from us, you probably got an envelope with a reply card.

An envelope with an incorrect address.

If you haven't sent the reply, yet, just swap the 42 for a 48, and you're golden.

If you have already sent the reply, we're going to talk to the nice folks at the post office tomorrow. We are getting them, which is how we know about the mistake, but it is taking a little while.